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DSXF 7"​(​JR​-​005)

by Douglas Shields & The X-Factors

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1.
I'm watching the building blocks burning the shine away. I'm feeling my flimsy pace lap on the shallow bay. I'm turning these words around on top of the dullest gray cinder blocks. I don't want this to be my slow release, 'cause I'm sinking faster. I don't want this to be my masterpiece. I want to break through this plaster wall. I've been slowing my breath for a while now. I've been letting myself age, become a messenger for the South. It's time to take the stage. Don't take the glass away. My mind is running away. My mind is going astray. I'm falling into the gray. Invite this truth decay. Swallow your tongue. Don't say a thing. Let the good times ring.
2.
There's this cold wind that blows through my window at night. It pulls on my sheets and reads me my last rites. Says, “This life is finite.” I guess I can't take my time. I saw my old city. Just like I remembered in the old, cold nights of my future. I won't be assaulted by the abyss. It seems so far away, but I can still reach it. The clock is folding in. The cross is twisting. I've got this machine, and it's gone missing. I'm not solid. There's too much space between the atoms that make up my body and my state. I am sullen. I'm sinking in. I'm not afraid of old age, I'm just afraid of what it's doused in. The clock is spinning sheets. The cross is lacking heat. I've got this machine, and it fucking cheats. I'm a spinning boat. Don't know how to swim. I can't find my way into the ocean. I am drowning. The waves keep crashing in from the east and the west and the south. The water keeps filling my mouth. The clock is on fire. The cross has got it lit. I've got this machine and I'm gonna break it.
3.
Stoner Jamz 02:55
I wear my t-shirt and my jeans, every day shaking the seams. They're not breaking apart. The word's not matching with the heart. I forgot about crescendos. I see light through the office windows. I'm staring up and reeling. I see cracks in the office ceiling. I have to say, I don't want to keep on living this way. I'm tired of all these schisms. I'm tired of this nihilism. I just want to keep on breathing.
4.
I took a dip in the still ice and I broke through the spite. The surface air tasted almost as good as the light. I thought I forgot how to thaw in the sun, 'cause in the ice there's nowhere to run. I'm worried one day I'll look back and wonder, “What have I done? When I was given so may different directions to run? Did I just take the back seat? What could I have been? What did I do with the bubble that I should have formed in?” I shrugged it off, robbed it of its shine. It wasn't mine.

credits

released February 14, 2011

Recorded at Black Bear Audio Maul in October 2010. In this recording, Douglas Shields & The X-Factors is Kiiks, Zach, and Randy.

Cover art by Jessie Brown.

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Jeremy Records Gainesville, Florida

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